Mcutler Thoughts, Music, Fiction

Back again

2005-04-28T00:13:00.000-06:00

Back again? Hopefully, I'd like to hide the previous entries because of their painfully blatant lies about things being just around the corner. But perhaps they'll serve to remind me not to abandon this quite so hastily in the future. I always feel like such a tool when I make these so called comebacks.

2005-01-18T01:41:00.000-07:00

20 come and gone, and almost like clockwork it seems another job has come and gone. It seems that I am once again bordering on the brink of unemployment, so on the plus side this site should be updated on a much more frequent basis. On the downside I'l probably be pretty stressed until I find a new job. I'm not finding this job search to be nearly as bleek as my last one and feel that this really shouldn't be much of a snag. If anything I guess it'l help me before I prepare to go to school.

I have joined a different blog as a contributor, I've found that this place is a great outlet for my personal and creative expressions but as far as news or politics it doesn't seem to fit. This new blog is entirely devoted to political/social/world issues and I will be contributing my thoughts there. http://bladehelix.blogspot.com

New music is JUST around the corner, check back soon.

2004-12-30T17:39:00.000-07:00

Another year almost over, another year older in age and yet I still feel as unchanged as ever. Soon I'll be 20, this is the most scary thought I can ever recall having. It's scary because it isn't some nightmare or worst case scenario imagination that goes through your mind and then eventually leaves when you get over it. This can't be gotten over, soon I will officially no longer be a teenager, and venture into the realm of "adulthood". I no longer have excuses such as "Well I'm young, I'm not supposed to know what I want to do with my life." and etc. I don't normally make new year's resolutions as I find they are impossible to keep if you weren't planning on doing your goal anyways. This year however, is an exception. I can't seem to get out of the rut that I am in, financially, socially and emotionally. I feel like I project an air of maturity that dwarves most 25 year olds, yet I feel like the same insecure 15 year old boy I did 5 years ago. So this year my goal is to attempt to become an adult, or even just to quell some of my nagging issues. Needless to say, this should be an interesting few months.

P.S. New content is up on the Lyrics/Poetry section.

2004-12-29T02:24:00.000-07:00

Now that things have started to calm down around here after the holidays I can get back into this rhythym again. Another Christmas come and gone, a rather good one this year. Family vists were painless and efficient, the way they should be. The gifts are how they always are, and I'm very satisfied with the whole time of year. Which in turn will lead to the usual insecurities and self-conciousness that always seems to come after a period of satisfaction. Such is life though. Speaking of gifts, I got a few new musical toys that should make recording some work a much easier task. I hope to get something new on the site this week to be heard so stay tuned and have a great new year!

2004-12-17T02:02:00.000-07:00

I figured the latest change to the "worth hearing" disc might take a few people by suprise so I figured it deserved a few words. Green Day has always been the band with an alright song here and there, always easy to listen to but always somewhat shallow. So what makes "American Idiot" worth hearing? Two things. Anyone who has something to say, who truly believes in it, and is educated on the matter is an opinion worth hearing. Secondly, it's just simply a great rock album. The latter is infact the more important of the two points, this isn't a political protest record. This is a rock record with political themes, notice the order those two aspects are placed in. Some politically charged records can seem as if the theme stands out from the record because its focused too singularly on that theme. "American Idiot" meshes together politically driven lyrics with a solid (if not the most creative) musical backing. Certain aspects of the album, such as the 5 track medleys are a stroke of creative genious and show that perhaps Green Day truly does have a vision for their music that their simplicity takes a backseat to.

2004-12-14T15:12:00.000-07:00

I'm alive... so I finally figured out why I couldn't be bothered to update this place, I hated the layout, it was completely impractical and very difficult to use. So here once again is the new and improved site for all things... well me. Semi-daily thoughts and music news will be posted here on the main site, while song lyrics/poetry and fiction can be accessed on their respective pages. Which I promise will be used this time. Downloadable and listenable music is available on the music site where I will post songs as soon as they are finished recording. Il hold down the perfectionist in me and post whatever I come up just so there's new content on the site regularly. Speaking of music I've come up with several new songs in the last few weeks and creative process is getting easier. There's some new lyrics up in that section currently, "Don't Bother Me is available for download and new mp3 audio is coming soon. Thanks for reading, new content coming soon. (I promise this time I will)

2004-07-25T10:40:00.000-06:00

It's remarkable how picky I've become when it comes to music. I used to listen to anything and everything and now can hardly tolerate one of every 40 songs on the radio or Much. Not that these outlets have ever been particularly reliable for showing great music, but its amazing how much I've matured, and how much I look for music that reflects that. I've recently gotten into Wilco, that feeling you get when you know you've stumbled upon something you're going to fall in love with is just euphoria. I can't wait to own every cd and find every single B-side that exists, because I can tell where this is going. Here in lies the problem with music today. I can't wait to discover everything I can about bands and/or musicians I love. Where as the majority of people simply don't give enough of a fuck about music to care whatsoever about what people stand for, or how far they've come in their careers. No one listens to music anymore, they drive to it, dance to it, and sing along with it. But they can't shut everything off and just listen. Lack of attention spans, boredom, whatever the case it's a sad state of affairs. Music truly is an artform to be respected, yet it's become so perverted and misused that the large percentage of people simply don't take it as seriously as they should. Being someone who has made music, my opinion obviously differs from many, but when you are making it, you should be pouring your entire soul into every lyric, every line. I know this because I sometimes go back and listen to my old music and can instantly tell when I wasn't 100% into it, I get embarrassed for myself, for releasing such a half assed offering and calling it a window into myself. Yet musicians these days seem to have no shame, whoring themselves to radio stations and record labels, half-assing song after song, hit after hit, and the radio listeners have such a short attention span, and so little understanding of music they don't even fucking notice they're being completely taken advantage of. But if they don't even fucking notice, why the fuck should they care.

2004-06-27T01:27:00.000-06:00

Personality, it's something that defines each and every one of us as human beings, it's part of what helps us differ from each other. Funny then, how everyone seems to be scared of any public figure having any of it whatsoever. Watching the NHL draft on Saturday, I noted how a young prospect who talent-wise was a top ten player, yet because of his confident and strong personality (some may call it cockiness) he slipped down almost 20 positions. Call me crazy, but in the world of sports, is that confidence and self-belief not something that seems like it could help a young player develop. A lot of people have self esteem and security issues, (myself included). Strange then how the NHL would be willing to pass on someone who seems to have already tackled these dilemmas at such a young age. It's almost as if, it wasn't who can help my team? More so, who can help my team, but do it in a 100% politically correct manner, frightening almost isn't it? But I suppose that's the way the world is going these days. Better to have children look up to shy, reserved, drones rather then individuals with strong opinions or beliefs. Because then just maybe, those kids might grow up to be individuals with strong opinions, and that would just be.... hell?

2004-06-22T16:17:00.000-06:00

So, the Italians have been eliminated from the tournement. Full marks to them for a great effort against Bulgaria, they at least managed to pull off 1 win in their otherwise pathetic showing. Unsuprisingly, as Italy has been eliminated, rumours of conspiracy are running wild as they claim the game between the Danes and Sweedes was fixed to end 2-2. Same old Italian excuses, one wonders why a supposedly great team, one which rates itself as top among talent in the world. Required 4 minutes of stoppage time to score the 2nd goal against BULGARIA of all nations. (keep in mind, this is the same Bulgarian sqaud that lost 5-0 to Sweeden). The bottom line is it doesn't matter if the game was fixed, or if the whole world is out to get the Italians. They won 1 game out of 3, perhaps if it required a conspiracy to keep them out, they might've had the resolve to beat either Sweeden or Denmark when they had the chance. I find it remarkable that the Italians can still lay blame on other individuals, and ignore the fact that Wayne Rooney of England has personally scored 1 more goal than the entire Italian team. (If you're wondering, that's a whole 4 goals in 3 games, great for a single player, below average for an entire team). So perhaps before Totti decided to spit at a Danish opponent and take a 3 game suspension, he might've decided to have an ounce of respect for his peers, for the sport of football, and for the fans. As far as I'm concerned, as long as the Italian National Football team remains a whiny, excuse filled, egotistical squad with a persecution complex, any football tournement is far better off without them. For the record, had the Danes and Sweedes actually "screwed" Italy (which they didn't) They would have my heartfelt congratulations. All that being sad, England is through, I can't wait for the quarterfinals to begin.

2004-06-14T16:22:00.000-06:00

If we could choose our careers truly based on things we excell at, there is no doubt in my mind; I would be a professional procrastinator. What a wonderous expirience this would be, THE dream job. Nothing ever needs to be done now, nothing ever needs to be taken care of because somewhere under me in my firm is someone who's profession is ambition and is stuck walking right behind me doing everything I don't feel is worth my time. I do however realize that this is certainly a negative quality, and in response to it I'm attempting to take steps towards breaking bad habits. For instance, this blog, a virtual wasteland when it comes to new content, (and lets face it, traffic) usually devoid of all signs of life for weeks at a time. Will no longer be home to weekly, 3 page essays or well constructed ideas, but more of a daily quick rant or idea which has been in my head. It should at least lead to some amusing entries, if nothing else.

2004 Euros

2004-06-12T15:45:00.000-06:00

Well today marks the begining of the 2004 Euro tournement in Portugal. An event hardly considered worth paying attention to on this continent, and possibly the biggest event of the year just across the ocean. Many people pass off pro Soccer as a boring, redudant game, because of it's lack of flash or even lack of structure. These two aspects really draw me to the sport. Another bonus is, when you watch Soccer, you WATCH SOCCER. There are no commercials of any kind to distract from the action and nothing to break the play for those with short attention spans. People who consider themselves sports fans and choose to ignore soccer, have no idea the type of moments and drama that they are missing out on. Football (soccer) is a beautiful sport, more-so then any other, even just for the sake of educating yourself on culture, you should try to at least check out one game this year. It might just change your mind.

2004-05-18T01:43:00.000-06:00

Why People Can't Say Television is Evil

I refuse to come to the conclusion that I watch too much television, a strange thing to fight against considering it occupies a large percentage of my free time. What I do believe is that I watch too much bad television, many people struggle to make this distinction and this is directly the cause of what has led to TV's downward spiral into absurdity. Imagine your favorite book you ever read, think of the affect it had on you and your life, the way it connected you to those characters and brought you into that world. The way every event had some type of significance or meaning towards the overall theme or message of the story. Think of being able to share these stories with millions of people all at once, broadcast throughout the continent. Only now with actors and sets and real people and real places to attach yourself to - You cannot say television itself is evil or destructive, the way its been manipulated and used as tools to cater to people's most simplistic desires or ideas of entertainment is what is evil. Blame money, blame executives, blame whoever you wish for this trend, we, the population are responsible for the way things are.

Consumers control the market, somewhere down the line in any business this is always true. If something isn't popular with the people, typically it fails and it's never heard of again. So why didn't this happen with television, simply put, people didn't want it to. Mindlessness has it's attractive qualities, we wish to kill time and a 30 minute sitcom does it effectively without asking anything from us. The idea of escaping from the real world is not the issue, any form of entertainment will in some way divert our train of thought. Stories or fantasies keep us sane, we need these types of escapes, we relate to characters and possibly learn things about ourselves, human nature or even life in general from literature and intelligently written drama. The problem arises when we are killing time simply to kill time, we shut our brains off and waste away taking away nothing from the 4 hours we've spent staring at advertisements and cheap humor. These 2 things are provided to us now at an almost overwhelming rate by networks wishing to cash in on trends. Can you blame them?

If you saw that the demand for clown shoes suddenly went through the roof, because perhaps maybe clown shoes were worn by someone cool or even who stood for something. Would you not try to jump at the chance to be the first to sell brand new clown shoes? This is how money is made, when there is a demand for something, a supply is created, the consumers will buy in if they want to, and if successful enough, certain people will attempt to keep the trend going by recreating it or repackaging it. This is how television how gotten to the state it's in. You can't blame executives or owners or networks because they are simply doing their jobs. People watch reality shows and trash television, and nothing else, so why create any other type of TV entertainment? If everyone was wearing and demanding clown shoes and you came out with white tennis shoes, you'd lose money, and look rather foolish.

Simply put, no one in any business will hear or see what people want (or are watching) and decide not to create this product (or show) to do something that people don't want (or aren't watching.) My favorite television show was cancelled this season, it's final episode airs on Wednesday. I attempt to blame the network or anyone else, but it isn't their fault. The blame can only be pointed squarely at the 13 million people who watch The Bachelor (weekly), the 10 million people who watch Fear Factor (weekly) and the 30 million people to watch American Idol (weekly). Until the majority of TV watchers actually want something that isn't mediocre, predictable, trash television, we won't get anything but that. I unfortunately don't see this type of change happening anytime soon.

After the previously mentioned finale airs this Wednesday, I will strongly consider disconnecting the cable to my TV here in the basement. Expect another blog on this subject then.

2004-05-17T16:40:00.000-06:00

Well here we are at last. I finalized the layout and got the design I wanted so It's all finished, the fiction works and reviews can now be accessed from the links on the top of this page. This home page will focus more on thoughts or issues that pop into my head. The content of the other sections seems self explantory, hope you enjoy all of this.

Matt